I super wanted to do some writing to clear my head before I attempted to tackle my assignment. But now I’m not sure. I’m too confused and my mind is too clouded with thoughts to even begin. But, a reflection.
When deciding where to go in life, obviously other people do have an influence. Where do you draw the line between the love you have for someone and the need to be selfish? I’m not chasing an easy, simple or ordinary dream, and I know that, and am OK with it. But i know deep down i need to go off on my own and get it done. I don’t want to create the pain for someone else of not knowing, the pain that ultimately I may feel on a daily basis; and besides; I have always preferred to suffer alone.
I have a decision to make. It won’t be fun, or easy- But either way I feel i’m going to come out of it with a broken heart.
For the longest time I have wanted to write.
For even longer I have let myself been held back the expectations of not others, as it would seem, but those I unfairly throw upon myself. I am not funny. My writing is not entertaining. Don’t write; who would want to read that?
No more. No more self-pity and no more self doubt. I am the bird. I do not claim to have all the answers, however I, like all do have my story to tell. I am incredibly lucky, incredibly blessed, more so than I ever thought I would be, with incredible people and opportunities in my life; I hope to share my story with both these friends and anyone else whom would take pleasure in reading.
Hopefully this will serve as a much-needed road to self-discovery. I am on a constant mission to better myself; I will do s through blogging, through sharing my experiences, having something to look back on t the end of the year and know that for all the times I was angry, smiling, laughing or crying, that I had a reason and I have learnt from that experience.
Who knows, maybe one day I will be brave enough to study journalism; not letting my fear of being a bad writer get in the way.